10 January 2007

just when i thought i was out, they pull me back in

i'm watching the sopranos on a&e. it's not quite the same. it's like watching that madtv where they put the sopranos on pax. watch...

anyway. so today could have been my second-to-last day at work, i'm not sure. nothing quite like pushing it right down to the wire, eh? i talked to my boss one week ago today, told her i wanted to transfer or take an educational leave of absence or something. i told her i didn't want to leave the company, that i love my job. she said she'd look into it, make some calls and get the ball rolling. as of today, she hasn't spoken to one single manager, hasn't talked to hr, hasn't done jack. two days ago, we discussed the idea of working a couple of days a week, a couple of long days - weekend days, even. that's fine. just make it consistent. make it something i can plan my week around, right? except today two days a week turns into 'we'll schedule you four to five days and you're responsible for cs-ing your extra days off.' i don't think i like that idea much. it's just too far to drive four or five days a week. so tomorrow i'm giving an ultimatum: work with my schedule or let me have my leave of absence or i'm quitting.

here's how i think the conversation should go:
superjanel: dragon lady, these are your options. one, weekend baggage bitch. two, loa. three, i quit. what's it going to be, lady?
dragon lady: oh, superjanel, i love you. i've never had such a wonderful baggage bitch, i can't bear to let you go. do you want to work three days a week or two?
superjanel: i'd prefer to work two. but since that's such a reduction in hours, i'm going to need a raise, you know, to make up for the money i'm not making.
dragon lady: i planned on that already. in fact, i already wrote that into the budget. i have a superjanel fund set aside for you to withdraw from whenever you want. when it runs out, you just let me know.
superjanel: okay, great. now about my hours. are we talking 10-hour days, 12-hour days, what?
dragon lady: well, i don't want you to work too hard, what with school and all. why don't we just schedule you for six-hour days? oh, even better yet, why don't you just work from home? we'll figure out a way for you to work from home. you don't ever have to come in or drive from dbq to dsm. you just concentrate on school. that's the most important thing right now.
that's nice of you. thanks. just a couple more things...
dragon lady: anything. we don't want to lose you. we need you!
superjanel: first of all, i'd like you to fire marty jones. he's a worthless piece of shit.
dragon lady: done! anything to keep you!
superjanel: and second, i have a friend that used to work here. can you make him eligible for rehire? i hear that's a pretty easy process for you...
dragon lady: of course, consider it done. oh superjanel, i'm so glad we had this talk!
superjanel: yeah, whatever. can i tl?
dragon lady: please do so. i'm not worthy!

however, the real conversation will prolly go much differently...
superjanel: dragon lady, this is what's up. i'm not digging this set up. this is what i need: two days a week, leave or quit.
dragon lady: you'll be eligible for rehire but i'm going to need your keys and your parking pass.

so. i'll know more tomorrow. thursday night's celebration could be a congratulations, you're still employed party or a sorry you didn't get to stay party. either way, i've decided i'm not going to stress. for a couple of different reasons. one, it's a job. but i will be eligible for rehire if i quit. and while a leave of absence does require a fulltime student status, which severely interferes with our housing situation (only one fulltime student), maybe a little fanagling can be arranged after the landlord checks with the school and so on and so forth... blah blah blah... it's all in the details and frankly i'm sick of dicking with it. two, it's a job that pays shit money and provides plenty of stress. i can go work at target and make the same money and have zero responsibility. instead of people yelling at me about their stupid lost bags they'll be yelling at me to find out if this crock pot comes in silver. bfd. jobs are jobs are jobs.

it's supposed to snow this weekend. like a lot. like 12 inches a lot. which is appropriate, as i sort of wanted to move this weekend. nice. but as it turns out, the gran massa champ had too much homework to accomplish in two days time and our application to the landlord just got faxed this morning. she was shitty to me on the phone and i even tried to bribe her with money (deposit money). she was all, this is my day off and the corporate office is closed for 10 days and this takes a long time and blah blah blah which was a nice way of saying what the fuck took you so long, you wanker? she eventually kind of came around and said that she'd try to work on it, knowing that school starts next week and we don't have anywhere to go.

ugh. gary, my ulcer/tapeworm is acting up. i'm kind of tired. maybe i'll go to bed. maybe i'll watch some tv. i'm bored.

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