yay me, yay me! i don't know how, i don't know why, but i'm back! is it temporary? is it permanent? i don't care! i'm here!
(i started this this morning, pre-rebirth of internet...)
another blog update from the land of the internet-less. would you care for an update in the ongoing saga of superjanel vs. the giant corporate conglomerate iowa telecom? no? too freaking bad. i'm going on five days - five - 5 - FIVE - without internet in my house now. and for those of you that know me, you know that this is killing me. my laptop is an extension of my body; i check my email compulsively. except for this week. so yesterday i get to speak with my post-holiday sobered up level two technician and the first question the dumb bastard asks me is, "is the modem plugged in?" if i weren't so desperately in need of a connection, i would have liked to say 'oh, no, you're right, that's it...this big black plug goes into the wall!' but alas, i did not and instead i played 20 (simple) questions with a level two "highly educated" technician. they're supposed to be sending out an inspector of sorts to look at the modem, because they can't seem to grasp the idea that my power light is always red and has never been green but what the fuck ever. ugh. i hate them, i hate them, i hate them.
what else? i guess i could have blogged from c-town after the xmas festivities but truth be told, i was pooped with a capital O. (the second one. not the first one.) my mom is wonderful. all of those silly little things i say i like throughout the course of a year she mentally files away and surprises me with, i would have never guessed that she remembered some of the stuff i got. it was great. aunt shell and robbie and schmalex and carli and even the infamous connah were still there when i finally made my appearance, so it was nice to hang with the fam and let them see me. carli is adorable, even if she does talk a lot. a whole heck of a lot. over and over and over. i guess i'm a little old school, you know, the school where children should be seen and not heard? but it didn't work so well for me, so i prolly shouldn't judge. if i could have changed anything about the holiday it would have been the fact that i would have like to get just one more thing for my momma, she deserved more than i got her. i know she's happy with what she received, but i just felt a little down about it.
xmas eve and xmas day i worked. it really wasn't too bad. the baggage scene was a little frantic but it made the days go by fast. my best good work friend, bless his heart, gave me a book. at first glance you might think that it's just a harmless little cookbook, decorated with sweet little innocent cookies on the cover, but read a few pages and you'll find that the cookies are a bit more devious. in fact the actual cookie recipe doesn't even come until the very last page. :) all i can say is that i've never seen gingerbread boys (and girls) in such compromising positions and i don't think they come bent in those shapes from the supermarket. in fact, i don't know if i can ever eat a gingerbread cookie again and not blush. but it made me laugh and i loved it. :)
xmas night. after bringing me pie to make my day at work go faster (or just to shut me up, i'm really not sure), my best good work friend invited me to eat his leftovers and watch movies with he and his bf. i've never eaten ribs and i've never spent xmas night watching borderline soft porn with homos. what can i say? i'm branching out.
so. here we are, two days after the big day. it's 0925 and i'm waiting on the inspector to inspect my red light. (hmmm...?) i'm watching the weather channel and contemplating life. i'm in the midst of a big decision, and it's possible that you're all going to think i'm nuts, more than usual, but i need to discuss this.
first, let me give you some background. i have a degree. it's an expensive degree. the cost of my degree is similar to the national debt load of the country of belguim, i imagine. big. large. ginormous. no, really, i'm not kidding. and now that i have my degree and i'm supposed to be all gainfully employed and so on and so forth, i'm supposed to be making payments on my student loans. well, the key phrase to hear out of that sentence is "supposed to" because, as with a few other things that i'm "supposedly" obligated to pay, i'm just not getting it done. now don't get me wrong, it's not that i don't know that i'm supposed to pay these things, it's just that you can't get blood from a turnip, sweet pea. if it's not there, it's not there. what do you do?
so. another thing to know is that i've been considering a major life change. for me, it would be a complete 180 from my pampered life of poptarts and vitamin water. this is something that i've wanted to do for a long time, pre- a lot of things but it never seemed to fit. well, now it sort of seems to fit. except that i'm facing a new opportunity of sorts that i'm sort of interested in and that would assist my situation in a couple of different ways.
i'm talking in circles.
okay. i'm thinking about moving about three hours away and going back to grad school or moving about three continents away and working for a government-funded humanitarian movement.
i like both ideas. going back to school would put my loans back in deferment while i figured out what i wanted to do with my life. it's not as severe as living in the congo and i could still move to africa if i wanted to, if i decided school wasn't the right thing to do or after i graduate (again). however, i'm in the midst of applying with the humanitarian movement and discussing options available to me there. working for such an operation also puts my student loans in deferment, or at least some of them.
i'm just not sure. i'm just pretty sure that the dutch village is not where it's at, at least for this chica. so again, i ask, if anyone wants to buy a big ass dining room table and six chairs - let me know. i've got one for sale. :)