18 March 2007

i will come at you like a spider monkey, old man.

people never fail to amaze me. just in general. they come to the airport, they've packed everything but the fucking kitchen sink and their common sense because they ask some of the stupidest fucking questions ever.

and their behavior? only acceptable at the airport. how many other public places do people yell at the top of their lungs and curse and carry on? and group mentality sets in if you have more than two people. if you have two people and one of them is being an ass, then generally the second person will commiserate with me, the berated employee. but if you have two people that are being asses they can sway the opinion of the whole group and then you've got a mob scene on your hands.

and a mob scene that's missing bags can quickly turn into a mêlée. now i enjoy a good mêlée from time to time. but tonight i was in no mood. so when i was confronted with a screaming man and his two bottles of broken rum and his "what are you going to do about it? and where's my fucking luggage?" attitude, i prolly went about answering in the wrong way. and for that, i was called every name in the book and will probably get a nice letter of commendation in the mail, addressed to my supervisor and detailing my compassion and helpfulness.

that's fine. go ahead. i don't care. fuck you. don't come at me like a gorilla in heat holding a box full of broken glass dripping rum on my fucking shoes and maybe, just maybe, we can converse like adults. until then, back the fuck up and watch your fucking mouth, you overgrown heathen motherfucker.

now, as far as your lost luggage? i'm going to smile so sweetly and tell you that it will most likely arrive on the next flight and we'll get it out for delivery just as soon as possible. i'm lying. don't listen to a word i say. because your shit is on the fast track to guam, bitches, and it's going to take weeks to get it back.

oh? you packed all your souvenirs in that bag? and your car keys? oh no... that's really too bad.

i'm here to help you. so don't fuck with me, dickhead.

ugh. somedays i just hate people.

tomorrow is my friday. and only 20 more days until good friday.

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