work is slow. painfully slow. i mean, there is literally nothing to do on my "to-do" list. and while generally i think that's pretty awesome, i am ready to pull my hair out today. i have done absolutely nothing. accomplished nothing. and you know what's on the agenda for tomorrow? nothing. i'm considering bringing a book to read while i'm at work; it is that freaking slow. too bad we don't have a washing machine here; i'd bring my laundry. "yup, we have great availability of 2008 gmc sierras - oh! hold on, that was the dryer. i need to fold my underwear..." but just one more day and then i'm off (from job #1) for four whole days. i am working at job #2, but that hardly seems like work.
this weekend is the bee's birthday. guess how old he's going to be? 23. that cracks me up. i'm a little excited that for about five weeks, i won't be five years older than him and then i won't feel like such a pederass, walter. but this weekend is his birthday and he won't tell me if he wants anything or if he wants to do anything... he's sort of being a pain in the butt about it, truth be told. and yet, if i don't do something or if i don't get him anything, i'm sure i'll never hear the end of it. "you don't love me, you didn't do anything for my birthday, wahh, wahh, wahh..." so i don't know. anyone have any suggestions?
how was your christmas? mine was wonderful, once the bee and i stopped arguing. we had a knock-down, drag-out fight on christmas adam (the day before christmas eve) and he ended up spending the day with his family alone and i ended up wrapping presents at my mom's. i hate arguing with him; he throws these really wonderful tantrums that just make my blood boil. but i'm sure i'm no picnic. anyway, we resolved our differences in the name of christmas spirit and fuel economy.
we spent christmas eve with my family. my gifts to others seemed paltry in comparison to years past and that made me feel a little bad (i mean, come on - i even regifted one present and i never do that!), even though everyone seemed pleased. its just one of those holidays where it seems no matter what i do, i always want to do more. and this year it just was not possible.
once again, and in spite of tremendous physical pain, my mom remembered all the weird little things i said i wanted throughout the year. i got the postsecret books, which i've wanted forever, and i got new pans (which we desperately needed) and i got really-not-so-awesome pg lady clothes. not that the clothes aren't awesome, it's just not awesome that i'm going to be as big as a grain silo in a few months. i'm not really looking forward to that at all. but the clothes are cute and i'm aware that they are a necessary evil. OH! and we got teeny weeny little baby slippers with ducks on them, and hats and blankets. too freaking cute.
we spent christmas eve night and christmas morning with his family. they're weird but mostly loveable. his mom hugged me before we left and said she loved me and wants me to be sure that i came around on a regular basis. it made me cry. i like his mom; she seems to be a good person and for the most part rational. his family seems pretty accepting of the situation; i got a good ribbing from most of them and things seemed okay. and now i feel a bazillion times better about that situation.
christmas day afternoon we spent with my father and his wife. it was phenomenal. (this is me, being sarcastic.) i had to bribe the bee to eat (and if you know the bee, that is really saying something. that boy never turns down food, ever.) for christmas day dinner with my dad and stepmom, we had overcooked ham, undercooked potatoes and mush that used to be mixed vegetables. i ate a lot of rolls. and then we left, because it was starting to smell like a bar, with all the cigarette smoke in an 8 by 10 room. blecch...
i was happy to be home on christmas night, away from people and just quiet. but the bee was restless and so we ended up at prairie meadows. on christmas day, of all things - can you imagine? that place was packed, which i found sort of shocking: why weren't these people home with their families? and then i realized they were kind of like me, probly just happy to have christmas over with and blowing off steam. and gambling away their christmas money. (i didn't do that, by the way, i didn't have any money. so i spent the bee's money. :) ) but it was okay. i'm honestly just happy that christmas is over; there's so much build up for it.
although, i have to admit, i prefer the christmas commercials that are no longer running to the political commercials that have taken their place. good god. i've considered caucusing but all the candidates are so unrelenting and catty - i can't imagine what it would be like to be surrounded by hundreds of their followers in a small room. blecch. besides, have you ever read about the actual caucus process? with all due respect, it's pretty fucking gay. nobody puts this baby in the corner; not for hillary or obama or edwards or anyone. thanks but no thanks, i'll just stay home and watch the results on tv. because for a week afterward, that is all that will be on tv.
i have a terrible cold; have i mentioned that? i know i mentioned that i've accomplished nothing today. that's sort of untrue if you consider coughing, sneezing, blowing and sniffling something. because i've done a lot of that. and the really fun part? are you ready for this? sometimes when i sneeze i feel like i'm going to pee my pants. that must be part of this whole baby thing, because i'm normally not a pants pisser. that sort of sucks. you know what else sucks? morning sickness. that really sucks. because i don't like to puke before i even get out of bed. the bee has to bring me a bucket before i can even roll over. that's like number one on my list of not-awesome things today.
ugh. just a few more minutes and then i get to go home. i'm hungry. what's for dinner? who's cooking? not me. and not the bee, he's out with friends. maybe i'll make fish sticks. or maybe i'll make grilled cheese, that sounds good. you know what i can't get enough of lately? sunkist orange soda. no caffiene, but plenty of sugar, i'm sure. i like to fool myself into thinking that if it tastes like orange it must be good for me. lol... okay. i'm off.