04 October 2006

oh hell.

it's not tuesday. it's wednesday. sweet balls! that means less than 48 hours! rock!


i know what i want. i know how i want things to turn out. i just don't have the guts to verbalize things because they're hurtful and there are too many people involved. one thing i detest about myself is my inability to discern between brutal honesty and hurtful honesty. there is a difference. i just don't know it because the only thing i'm interested in is my needs, wants and goals, regardless of what or who is at stake. how does a person learn to consider other people? and balance that consideration with needs and wants? aren't i supposed to know this by now? maybe i missed this day in school. i missed a lot of school. that must be it. i just don't know how to figure it out.

my laundry's done. i'm going to try to go to bed. again.

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