i just said poppycock. that makes me giggle.
just a bunch of random stuff...
i had someone say to me not that long ago that she wished she had a blog so she could bitch all the time. and that made me feel bad: do i subject my readers to a bunch of nonsensical bitching and moaning? that was never the point, i swear. some days it just goes that way. some days are good for bitching. some days are better than others.
today is a good day. work was good, or as good as it will ever be. i had a four hour training class that ended with a quiz that i aced; that's always a nice feeling. and i wasn't even the biggest jerk-off in class and i didn't even have to keep my sarcasm in check. rock. i don't mind my job, really - sometimes i just mind going to work. my mom's always concerned that i'm going to lose my job. but i try to console her by letting her in the grand scheme things, work related at least, i'm a freaking angel. i mean, so far i haven't shown up drunk, my pants don't have holes, i'm not at the bottom of (all) the reports and i attend work on a moderately regular basis (at least 72 percent of the time).
really, what more could they ask of me? i rule.
i do need to let you know that the bee and buddha are back. they arrived late last night. i'd be lying if i said i wasn't happy to see them; i was. but there won't be a next time for this. i'm tired of watching the bee pack his things and leave - so i advised him to think carefully about what he wanted before he came a-knocking on my door yesterday, because the next time that he says, "do you want me to leave?" i'm going to say yes and assist him in packing his things.
no sweatshirt left behind. (that was the act quickly signed into law by congress right after the whole "no child left behind" act. the sweatshirts just didn't get as much coverage. fine. don't believe me. i don't care. it's my world, y'all are just walking around in it.)
anyway. i love the bee, but it's just as easy for me to be miserable and alone (and able to do the things that i want to do) - if not easier - as it is to be miserable and with him. and i told him this as well. his presence is *not* necessary to my survival, no matter how much my heart is breaking or how much i think i need him. because i don't need him to get through my life - but i do want him here. i do want him in my life. for all the little reasons and for the biggest one that i can think of - because i love him - i do want him in my life.
and for now, things are okay. things are good. they're not perfect, but nothing is, and it's a work in progress. which i want to work. and the bee says he wants to work. so we'll work on it and see where it goes. but oh my goodness, was the pootie excited to see his buddy! that was the cutest thing. dogs are so forgiving - it's so sweet. they don't hold grudges, they're just excited to see you. these goofy dogs just make me day. they always make me feel better. i love my puddies. and i'm happy my buddha boy is back.
however, tomorrow the buddha baby goes in for the big boy surgery. yup, he's getting clipped. it was recommended that we wait until both dogs are of age so we can have the surgeries done at the same time, but once the buddha baby decided to "mark" the bed, i decided it was time to just the ball rolling.
no pun intended.
we went swimming tonight at the apartment complex pool. in his former life, the bee was a lifeguard which is probably a good thing because i tend to sink like a brick. or an anchor. or an anchor tied to a brick. i used to be able to swim, i don't know what happened to that skill. i guess like anything, the less you use it, the more you forget it. except for the proverbial bike, right? although, that could just be a lie too - i haven't ridden a bike in years. that could be just as big a disaster as the first time i rode a bike - and for the record, who takes their kid's training wheels off in a muddy driveway with big puddles?
i have never forgiven my father for that fateful ride.
one of my two best good friends in the whole wide world has taken up the wonderful sport of blogging. she recommends that you "pee in your own bed." i don't know if it's just because we were raised differently, perhaps it's the difference in growing up on one side of the mississippi river as opposed to the other. shit, i don't know, maybe she's mixing something in the kool-aid down there. but i'm of the school of thought that if you're going to pee the bed, like, if this is a pre-determined thing you have going on - i say go in somebody else's bed.
and that is my sage advice for the day. you can't say that i've gotten to be 28 years old and not learned anything.
but read her blog and comment and encourage her to write more. because she's awesome. and because i said so and you need no other reason.
i broke the washing machine today. i was washing (get this) a pair of jeans and two shirts and some underwear (and when i say some i mean some, really - not like some like 150 pair) and the damn thing started making this awful KA-THUG KA-THUG KA-THUG noise like i was actually stonewashing my jeans with like live boulders or something. it was freaking crazy. (i know the girl downstairs just hates us but ask me if i really care. she's the stupid C U Next Tuesday that turned us in on the dog poop but that's a whole different story). anyway, the washer's KA-THUG-A-THUG-A-THUGging and the dogs are going crazy and the bee's screaming because there's no hot water (i do enjoy starting the washing machine while he's in the shower) and i couldn't get it to stop - the lid was all locked and it was just mass hysteria craziness for like 14 minutes and all i could do was sit there and eat my tuna casserole and wonder what the hell i'd done to deserve this kind of punishment.
for the love.
so finally the washer stops, the KA-THUG-A-THUG-A-THUGging subsides and i can open the lid to see what the hell i forgot to take out of my pockets that would cause such a fucking ruckus. and i look in and the tub's all tipped sideways and i can't even see any of the clothes but i can hear water and that's never a good thing. so i have to call maintenance, right? and they're going to come out and look at it but all i can think is that i want to get my grundies out before the maintenance guy gets there because that's my business and not even his business and the last thing i want is for the maintenance guy to see my lesbian (seagull) rainbow grundies and assume the worst, not that it even matters, because 1) the maintenance guy weighs 800 pounds and 2) the bee came back, duh, so whatever.
but because the fix-it-guy weighs 800 pounds his forearms are shaped like easter hams and there was no way he was cramming those things in there to get my grundies out and because i apparently broke all the struts on the washing machine (which he didn't even think was possible, he asked if i was washing rocks), my grundies have to wait until tomorrow when the whole fix-it-guy crew comes to replace the whole damn thing.
bitches and hos. that means that all the maintenance people are going to know about my lesbian (seagull) rainbow grundies. arrrghh.... i just thought they were cute, i swear to god.
and after all that - i won't even tell you about the saga with the refrigerator, the dishwasher or the screen door that i had to take off the damn hinges after i tried to walk through it. lol... nope, that's enough household appliance terror for one evening.
and i think that's all i have for today kiddos. i'm feeling a little spastic, i don't know if i'll sleep well. i'd take a pill but i have to be up in a few hours - the day starts early with doggies.
peas out. love, superjanel