if you still feel raw about it, i'll be waiting

i just kicked out the king bee. not permanently, at least i don't think so. i told him i'm not his roommate, his whore or his maid, and i refuse to be treated as such. he said to call him when i feel like talking again. i told him to call me when he realised how shitty he was making me feel.

i guess i'm kind of testy this evening. but i'll bet you my phone doesn't ring. and i know mine won't be dialing out...

gahhh. fucking boys, anyway. i hate them all.

so my "roommates" are on vacation. and that leaves me housesitting and dogsitting. housesitting is awesome, because i can watch my movies on the big tv really loud like i like them. and i can either do the dishes as i dirty them or i can wait until i'm out of glasses and then wash them all. (i'm not waiting. i'm far too anal retentive for a sink full of dirty dishes; ick.)

however, dogsitting is NOT so awesome. the dog hates me. and she's fucking crazy. she wouldn't eat her dinner last night (dinner, by the way, is a specially crafted plate of ham and chicken and cheese - not dog food, as you might imagine.) so she started barking at 0300 this morning because she was hungry/bored/mad that i was sleeping. and she barked nonstop until nearly 1000. what made her stop barking? i went and bought her a freaking roasted chicken, as suggested by my roommate and she ate the whole thing and took a nap. later, as i tried to put her out, she gangbusted the door and went for an unauthorized stroll about the neighborhood. about 20 minutes later she just came home.

i hate this dog. plus, she keeps jumping on my bed which is just pissing me off. grrr....

so. work. let's talk about work, shall we? yup. i'm gainfully employed and i have one of those titles that sounds really important. i'm a business development coordinator. what does that mean? well, obviously, i develop and coordinate business, you big dummy. no, really, it means that the salespeople at the antichrist of car dealerships that i'm now employed by are really not happy to see me every morning. but that's okay, since they're all old and not cute anyway.

at least not at my location. which is probably good. that could be kind of distracting. the phone guy is adorable and he's distracting enough.

anyway. work is good. i like it, so far. my boss is kind of scatterbrained and in the right light (or maybe the wrong light?) she has one hell of a moustache, but she's a back scratcher and she likes me. i'm sort of the "teacher's pet" and i like it that way. my coworkers are decent; at least 66.6 percent of them are. the remaining 33.334 percent is an insecure double bagger asian chick whose previous experience includes getting fired from the dealership/amusement park across the street. most of the time, she's not bad, if you don't look her straight in the face. the rest of the time i just want to club her with a blunt object. but whatever. a job is a job is a job is a job...

i just have to get moved. and that may be happening soon. i may have found a way to get through my financial woes more quickly than i thought. more news on that as it develops.

i'm seriously feeling bad about that whole argument with the king bee and he's probly asleep. i fucking hate boys. all of them. gahh...

so i think my fish is sick. norman, who i think is actually a norma, is looking swollen and is bottom sitting. beginning signs of dropsy, which as i found with roger cannot be cured. but then i fed him and now he's looking fine. perhaps he was swollen as a sign of starvation? i don't know. i can't figure the fuckers out. you feed them; they die. you don't feed them, they still die. they should be more like cats.

but not dogs.

i bet he doesn't feel bad at all. i bet he doesn't even understand why i'm mad. all day long, he did nothing but slept or ate or used my roommates kitchen or bathroom or shower; he was pissy when he had to buy lunch; he would have rather have played psp than talked to me on our way to cville this afternoon - the time actually spent with me, not sleeping or showering or trying to put his hand in my pants or watching telly was basically nonexistent. and i was feeling a little bit used. so i told him so. and he made that pathetic little puppy dog, "i don't get it face" and i held my ground.

and now i feel like a bitch.

i'm going to go watch the yankees beat the red sox and text message someone who at least pretends to care about me.

janel mc fibbypants, yes, it's me

okay, yeah, i know. i know, i said i was done. i know i said i was taking my blogging business elsewhere. i know, i said i was tired of the hostility and crap and blah, blah, blah... you know what?

i lied. yes, i fibbed. turns out its only been four days and i'm back. dude, i'm kind of bored. i know. but i gots nothing else to do with my time other than entertain you poor souls.

so here i am. besides, you know you missed me.

so, okay. i haven't been online for like the last three days. part of the reason being that i bought the new harry potter book - i'm a little ways into it and it's pretty good, btw - and i'm terrified that i'll stumble upon the ending accidentally. and i want it to be a surprise. i mean, i'm (sort of) an adult (i don't want to grow up, i'm a toys r us kid - i could sing you the whole song, me and geoffrey) and i have a pretty good sense as to what's going to happen, but I DON'T WANT TO KNOW BEFORE I TURN THE LAST PAGE. so if you know, do me a favor AND DON'T FUCKING TELL ME, OKAY? thanks.

ooh. looky what i got...

the kittehs believe this is kitteh salad.

aren't those just awesome? yup. i got flowers last week. last wednesday. from the king bee. total surprise, he had them waiting for me when i got to his house. i know, say it with me: aww... yeah, it was pretty sweet of him. so what is "this" turning into? um, i dunno. and i'm not being an asshole when i say that. okay, well sort of i am, because i am just an asshole. he keeps introducing me to people that seem to matter to him, like his parents and his brother and (soon to be) sister-in-law and nephew and grandparents and friends. and i'm all, 'yeah, you'll get to meet my moms sometime...' and i guess i'd introduce him to my friends if i had any. (yeah, that was a joke, yo.) so i keep getting weirded out by the fact that he's younger than i am. we're not talking like, pederass younger here - it's only five years. but it's still strange. we don't seem to have a lot in common but we have fun together and i like him, he makes me laugh. and that's good for now, right? right.

i just fed my fish because i realised i haven't fed him in about a week and a half and he's getting a little lazy, which in the fish keeper's world is code for starving to death. and i think i overfed him. by about six pounds of fish flakes which are still floating in the water. i can hardly see the damn fish anymore. his fish food smells like salmon, which i think is weird, because who knew that goldfish were cannibalistic?

there's this girl that works at the whippity dippity and her boyfriend, soon to be husband (i'm not sure who to feel sorry for there but i don't really care because i get to go to the bachelorette party and dance on tables, woot!) is a city cop, one of the dutch village's finest. yes, the same dutch village where everything is holy, overpriced, freshly mowed but not on sunday and stuck in the back of the closet. but anyway. it cracked me up to know that in order for a cop to carry pepper spray they have to be pepper sprayed themselves. (hells yes, where can i sign up to pepper spray some pigs? bacon, bacon, bacon...!) but this is what really cracks me up. apparently this particular copper copper crime stopper has a squirrel problem in his garden. so he spent his day off in a lawn chair, in said garden, waiting for said squirrel, holding said can of pepper spray, so he could attack the squirrel with the pepper spray to "teach it a lesson." those are some big dutch dollars hard at work there, my friends.

so i am in love with the movie kung fu hustle. and now i must see more kung fu. must. like, MUST. so on my days off this week i'm going to go get me some more kung fu. suggestions? anyone? anyone? bueller?

okay. i'm tired. and there's a myspace survey calling my name. peas out, biznatches...